One Decision
The First Step to a Better Life
Book Edition Details
Summary
Every day, you're faced with thousands of choices, but what if a single decision could redefine your life's trajectory? In "One Decision," Coach Mike, a familiar face from the Dr. Phil Show, distills two decades of expertise into a transformative guide that encourages authenticity as the cornerstone of change. With a foreword by Dr. Phil McGraw, this book unravels the complexity of decision-making, offering a fresh perspective that replaces fear with facts and confusion with clarity. Whether you're at a crossroads or seeking a complete reinvention, Coach Mike's blueprint empowers you to embrace your true self, transforming life's obstacles into gateways of opportunity. Say goodbye to overthinking and hello to a life where every decision is met with confidence and peace of mind. "One Decision" isn't just a book—it's your personal manifesto for a purpose-driven, fulfilling life.
Introduction
Have you ever found yourself standing at a crossroads, knowing something needs to change but feeling overwhelmed by the endless possibilities? That nagging feeling that whispers "there has to be more than this" isn't just dissatisfaction—it's your authentic self calling you toward a better life. Every day, we make approximately 35,000 decisions, yet most of us struggle with the ones that truly matter. The difference between those who transform their lives and those who remain stuck isn't intelligence, luck, or resources. It's the ability to make decisions from their most authentic self rather than from fear, confusion, or external pressure. When we align our choices with who we truly are at our core, something magical happens: obstacles transform into opportunities, and the universe begins to conspire in our favor. Your journey toward authentic decision-making starts with understanding that you already possess everything you need. The power to create meaningful change lies not in making perfect decisions, but in making authentic ones as your Best Self.
Foundation: Becoming Your Best Self
Your Best Self isn't a fantasy version of who you think you should be—it's the most authentic, genuine expression of who you already are at your core. Think of it as the person you become when you're completely at ease, operating from your values rather than your fears, and making choices that align with your true nature rather than external expectations. Mike shares a powerful example through his work with interventions, where families desperately try to save loved ones from addiction. In one particular case, he was working with Bill, whose family had gathered to confront his drinking. Following strict company protocol, Mike was supposed to stay with the family when Bill stormed off to his bedroom in anger. But something deeper called to him—his authentic intuition told him to break protocol and follow Bill. Despite the risk to his job, Mike listened to his Best Self and sat on Bill's bed, speaking honestly about love, loss, and the choice before him. That authentic moment of connection, born from Mike's willingness to act from his true self rather than rigid rules, was what ultimately convinced Bill to enter treatment. Bill didn't just get sober that day—he transformed his entire life trajectory. Years later, he remains clean and has rebuilt relationships with his family. The ripple effects of one authentic decision continue to create positive change. This is the power of operating from your Best Self: when you make choices aligned with your core values and authentic wisdom, you create space for miracles to unfold. To identify your Best Self, reflect on moments when you felt most alive, purposeful, and true to yourself. What qualities were you expressing? What values were you honoring? These aren't aspirational traits—they're authentic aspects of who you are when fear and external pressure aren't driving your decisions. Start each day by connecting with these qualities, and let them guide your choices rather than defaulting to old patterns or seeking approval from others. Remember that your Best Self already exists within you. It's not something you need to create or achieve—it's something you need to uncover and trust. When you make decisions from this authentic place, you're not just changing your life; you're stepping into the person you were always meant to be.
The FORCE: Shifting from Obstacles to Opportunities
The FORCE represents five powerful patterns that either trap us in obstacle-thinking or liberate us into opportunity-mindset. These invisible forces shape every decision we make, often without our awareness. Fortune-telling versus Fact-finding, Overgeneralizing versus Objective thinking, Rigid versus Relaxed mindset, Confused versus Clarified purpose, and Emotional versus Evidence-based reasoning—these forces determine whether we see roadblocks or pathways in any given situation. Consider Mike's client Eva, a successful businesswoman haunted by her relationship history. Having endured four traumatic relationships with different fathers of her children, she had convinced herself she was destined to be alone. Eva was trapped in overgeneralization, allowing past experiences to dictate her future possibilities. She told herself, "I have a broken picker when it comes to men," and lived in constant fear of ending up as "that old lady alone in an apartment." This negative force kept her stuck in obstacle-thinking, unable to see any opportunity for love or connection. Through their coaching session, Eva learned to shift from overgeneralization to objective thinking. Instead of judging her entire capacity for relationships based on past mistakes, she began to see the fuller picture: she had successfully raised four children, built a thriving business, and overcome significant trauma. She recognized that her past choices were made from a place of unhealed attachment wounds, not from an inherent inability to choose healthy partners. This shift in perception was transformative—suddenly, she could see opportunities for healing, growth, and eventually, healthy relationships. To harness the positive FORCE in your own life, start by catching yourself in negative patterns. When facing a challenge, ask yourself: "Am I fortune-telling the outcome or gathering actual facts? Am I overgeneralizing based on one experience or looking at the whole picture? Am I being rigid in my approach or staying open to new possibilities? Do I understand my true purpose in this situation, or am I confused by too many voices? Am I making this decision based on temporary emotions or solid evidence?" These questions help you shift from obstacle-thinking to opportunity-mindset. The beautiful truth is that every obstacle contains the seeds of opportunity. When you learn to recognize and redirect these forces, you don't just solve problems—you transform them into stepping stones toward your better life.
Building Your Decision-Making Team
No one creates a better life in isolation. Even the most successful people attribute their achievements to the team of supporters, advisors, and cheerleaders surrounding them. Your decision-making team isn't just about having people to ask for advice—it's about surrounding yourself with individuals who know your authentic self and can help you make choices aligned with who you truly are. Mike's friend Deacon exemplifies the power of having the right teammate. Born into a religious cult, raised in homeless shelters, and struggling with addiction by age twelve, Deacon's story could have been one of permanent defeat. Instead, at his lowest point—waking up bloody and alone at the bottom of a canyon—he made the decision that would change everything. He chose recovery, not just from drugs, but from the entire mindset that had trapped him in cycles of self-destruction. Today, Deacon travels the world in his career and owns his own home, having defied every statistical prediction about his life outcome. What makes Deacon invaluable as a teammate isn't just his inspiring story—it's his ability to remind Mike of his authentic self when pressure mounts. Minutes before Mike's biggest speaking engagement to 3,000 people, he called Deacon not for advice, but for that shot of confidence that comes from someone who truly knows and believes in you. Deacon's simple words, "You've so got this," weren't just encouragement—they were a reminder of Mike's authentic capabilities, delivered by someone whose opinion he trusted completely. Building your decision-making team starts with identifying the roles you need filled: the Sounding Board who listens without judgment, the Visionary who sees your potential, the Motivator who energizes your action, the Nurturer who supports you through setbacks, the Wise Counsel who offers hard-earned wisdom, and the Helper who shows up practically when needed. Not every person fills every role, and that's perfectly fine. Look around your current relationships and identify who naturally fulfills these roles in your life. Then, be intentional about deepening those connections and, where gaps exist, actively seek to build relationships with people who complement your team. Remember, being a great teammate yourself—showing up authentically for others—naturally attracts the kind of people who will show up authentically for you.
Taking Authentic Action Toward Change
Knowing what to do and actually doing it are two entirely different challenges. Authentic action bridges the gap between insight and transformation, turning your decisions into the reality of a better life. This isn't about perfect execution or avoiding mistakes—it's about consistently choosing to act from your Best Self rather than from fear, confusion, or the desire to please others. Mike's journey with public speaking perfectly illustrates this principle. Despite building a successful life coaching practice, he avoided public speaking for years because it didn't "feel good." His emotional reasoning told him that if something felt uncomfortable, he shouldn't do it. But when he shifted to evidence-based reasoning, the facts told a different story: he had been successfully presenting ideas in group settings for decades, he had valuable insights to share, and his discomfort was simply the natural growing pains of developing a new skill. The transformation was remarkable. Mike pushed through the initial discomfort and discovered not only that he enjoyed public speaking, but that it became a powerful vehicle for his message. He's now a regular on national television, speaks to corporate audiences worldwide, and hosts his own podcast. What started as an obstacle—the fear of public speaking—became one of his greatest opportunities for impact and fulfillment. This shift happened not because his feelings changed, but because he chose to act based on evidence rather than emotions. Taking authentic action requires you to identify both what you need to stop doing and what you need to start doing. Create two lists: behaviors that keep you stuck in your current situation, and behaviors that would move you toward your desired outcome. Then, systematically begin replacing the stuck behaviors with the growth behaviors, one decision at a time. The final step is perhaps the most crucial: after making your authentic decision and taking aligned action, you must let go of the outcome. Trust that when your choices come from your Best Self and you take consistent action toward your goals, the universe will handle the results. This doesn't mean becoming passive—it means staying actively engaged in your process while releasing attachment to specific outcomes. Your better life isn't created by one perfect decision, but by a series of authentic choices made consistently over time. Start today, start imperfectly, but start authentically. The life you're meant to live is waiting for you to claim it.
Summary
The journey to a better life isn't about finding the perfect decision—it's about learning to make every decision from your most authentic self. When you operate from this place of genuine alignment, obstacles naturally transform into opportunities, and the universe begins to conspire in your favor. As Mike powerfully reminds us, "Success is being ourselves. Why would we have been created as ourselves if we were meant to be someone else?" This truth cuts through all the noise of external expectations and societal pressures, returning us to the fundamental reality that our authenticity is not just our greatest asset—it's our primary responsibility. The FORCE that drives your decisions can either trap you in patterns of limitation or liberate you into endless possibility, and the choice is always yours. Surround yourself with people who see and support your authentic self, take action aligned with your true nature, and trust the process even when you can't see the outcome. Your better life isn't a destination you'll someday reach—it's a way of being you can choose right now. Start today by making one decision, however small, that honors who you truly are rather than who you think you should be.
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By Mike Bayer
